Sometimes people will search for a method to end their lives quickly and painlessly and there are answers, but know that none of them is really painless.
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I have tried before but failed. I just know in my heart that one day I will end my life.???? -
I just can't shake this feeling waking up feeling of complete discust I even try to go to church to save and rid of any dark thoughts. Not even the lords words can shake this feeling actually just makes me feel worse about who I am and what I became nothing but negative word repeat. And i try and fight it I push away any friends I have. They try all it does is make me feel worse. I remember I used to be happy and never alone having friends that i love being there for them when they need me. Seeing more distant as there happy and in love. happy for them. Having parents that make fun of you blame you for every mistake call u crazy. My mother wants me dead anything I've done is told to the world even my own nephew stole from me I have no family were so distant we hate each other family argument on Christmas. Thanksgiving my birthday when I was young such a dysfunctional family I have but who not. If I ever wanted to love someone they wouldn't enjoy the sex with flaccid cock I have in my 20s and I can't even make love to girl I like or ever will like I was made fun of by a couple of them my first love cheated on me. I stayed faithful I loved her I guess I will never be good enough for any everybody got a label to throw on you black guys have big cocks well your wrong just an average guy. Stranger in church look at me ugly. A friend I used to know called me a molested ass broke can't keep a job ass nigger I helped his sorry ass too. gave him a ride to go see his dead girlfriends mother. I didn't deserve that. Age 5 I was raped by this guy. Can't even hold down a job my sickness gets in the way and made a bad rep for myself now I can't get another job. Am I crazy to feel this way. Feel like nothing but a disappointed nigger. All black people can do anything well I can't joke right nigger can't support nothing. Feeling more empty and more distant as the years go by hating who I am even more trying to shake this feeling as I fall into a burning ring of fire. I wanna burn I wanna die stop the sickness pain I have i wanna die there's no love here for me just more disappointment in there eyes I can't handle any more why was I born
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Dhanalakshmi, Hi viewers now am very much in depression. So I wanted die but I couldn't coz have kids. Who will look for them. I dnt have father even no one is there for me. All are playing . they are think that I waste girl. My in-laws my husband all are behaving like that. In front of me even my hubby kidding all are. Behind me bad to me
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I don't want live I just want to die
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I have this theory (alothough im sure others too) on depression and suicidal.. I actually believe the scientific reason why depressed and suicidal people are the way that they are. That there are chemicals unbalanced in your brain. Which leads having you unsatisfied with your own individual life. So it isn't our fault, we didn't make our selves to be this way. I'm sure there are a majority of us who truly do wish we can be happy, it's just something in our brain that isn't allowing that permanent state of happiness. Nothing is good enough for us. We want more, more love, more friends, More money, more time, just more everything and sometimes it just isn't enough still. But at the same time we can see how much of a burden we are to our loved ones because we know we can't have the "more" that we want and need. We can see failure in the things we do. The money, energy and time that will be wasted. The realistic side of us shows us that it just isn't possible for what we need to be happy sometimes because we simply just want more. I think.. Anyways I grew up a Christian and I was taught that suicidal leads to hell. If we believe God created us, then I think I have to believe God created me this way, this way of depression. So why should I go to hell if God created me this way? They say God has a plan for us all, is that my plan then? Is my plan to live my life with depression, commit suicide, and rot in hell? If this is suppose to be a test of strength and faith for me, why the hell do I need to be tested? Why put this depression in me? Why can't you test the people that are happy, the people that don't have our problems. The people that can wake up knowing they are happy and never knew the of depression. The people that already have a lot.
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I'm at the point where I'm at peace of taking my life. You can only take so many ups and downs, and in the end, happiness is a fraction of all the pain. Family I love, if it wasn't for them I wouldn't be chatting right now, I don't want them to loose someone in which they love and go through dark times. Time will tell. I just had to throw my two cents in and tell people I understand why your thinking this way!
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I'm looking for an easy way to end my life, I just can take it anymore. any suggestions?
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help me i don't want to live this life anymore!
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i think am gonna try the carbon monoxide thing.
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Im 29 with 3 boys. To pain and guilt that lies upon my shoulders are too heavy. I just want to take me and my kids and go home to a much better happier place. I hate life. It has never gotten better. And the more my life goes on the more pain I feel from being betrayed lied to and now wanted makes it even harder to fight the urge to not rob my kids of their life. But in reality life and this world will only get worse as the times go. So why make them endure the same pain Ive gone through... I love my kids enough to take them with me n not leave them behind
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