Losing the Love of Your Life

You will keep telling yourself that you are okay while you are not.

You will become emotionally numb and try everything you can to get your feelings back.

You will have a hard time accepting that your beloved one has become a stranger.

That will be the last straw to you when you realize that he or she has deleted you on the Facebook account but you still have mutual friends.

You will think about him or her all the time. TV shows, fragrances, foods, everything will remind you of him or her.

You will miss the feeling of doing nonsexual things with him/her, such as taking photos of him/her while he/she is sleeping or drying off after taking a shower.

You will remember how you used to cook for him/her in your underwear and how he/she used to say that he/she loves you.

You will remember all the mistakes you made in your relationship.

You will long for a chance to start all over several months after you’ve broken up, even if you know he/she is over you.

Instagram photos will make you realize that you are sad without him/her.

You will be terrified if a friend shares with you that he or she has been single for four years since his or her last relationship.

You will compare everyone who takes you out with him/her.

You will be careful in your future relationships after losing the love of your life.

See the breakup as his or her loss

You will regain your confidence and value when you see the breakup as his or her loss and not your loss. You do not become unlovable or unworthy when someone walks away.

Accept that you cannot control the situation

It is difficult to accept that you cannot change the situation. You may try to win the person back by begging him/her or behaving like the person he/she finds attractive. You will look desperate in that way instead of winning him/her back and nobody wants to be with a desperate person. Accept that you can only control yourself and not other people or situations.

Remain cool

Remind yourself the ABC (Always Be Cool) rule whenever you feel like sending him/her a text, re-tweeting their posts, or reacting to their Facebook posts. Your new job is to keep your cool and remind yourself that it is their loss.

Make yourself occupied with new activities

Distracting yourself will help you forget your ex. Spend time with people who appreciate you or find a new hobby; try the things you have always wanted to do; travel if you have enough money and time; read, or watch new funny films or old movies. Avoid dwelling on your past or the future you once dreamed of.

Expect surprises in the future

You do not know how things will turn out in the future after losing the love of your life. Events will prove to you that you were wrong about your previous future plan and you will learn lessons from your past relationships. Expect the future to have good surprises for you and move on with enthusiasm.

Never ask yourself why

Asking why makes you feel unsatisfied and fills you with toxic thoughts. Remain positive and find reasons to be thankful. For instance, be thankful for your good health, flowers or even good food. You will eventually learn to be thankful for the breakup and see it as part of your journey.

Do not limit yourself

Accept the healing process as it is. Your heartbreak is unique to you. Do not limit yourself and create schedules or rules that you must follow to heal. You may have more bad days than good days at the beginning but eventually, things will turn around.

Understand that wounds make you stronger

Wounds may be horrible but they build your inner strength. They give you an unmatched mind. You will start to find meaning in things that seem meaningless before. You will see and feel people in new ways and learn to live again after the tragedy.

Build a new life

You must rebuild your life if your past relationship has defined your life. Learn to live without the person that you have a hard time forgetting about. Start afresh instead of trying to patch your old life together. You cannot stay in the same place forever after losing the love of your life.

Understand that “the one” may not last forever

People look for “the one” or the “right” person before loving completely. They want emotional security and hope to reduce their chances of getting hurt. The truth is that life is transitory. People die and marriages break. People who get hurt are those who wait to find the right person for them, because they are too obsessed with the idea of “the one.”